I love to do little special things for Zack. So much so, that it might be close to addiction. Whether it is making a pitcher of his favorite tea when he comes home, buying him a shirt I find on sale, or sticking a post-it note on his dashboard in the car. I just want him to know I'm thinking of him that day.
Last week we were talking to a new pastor at our church who said he had been married 10 years. Anyone who has been married longer than me, I always ask what their one piece of advice for a great marriage is. He happens to also do marriage counseling besides his preaching ministry, so we had a wonderful conversation on ideas to do!
Some ideas...
-make sure you ALWAYS make time for a date. Big or small, expensive or no cost at all, take time once a week, every two weeks or at least once a month to invest in your relationship with your spouse.
-Teddy Bear: find a small cheap bear of some sort and put a love note on it and hide it for your spouse. Whenever he/she finds it, its their turn to put a note on it and hide it. It only takes a few moments, but it can mean a lot to the receiver of the note!
-Date Scrolls: write down some ideas of things for the two of you to do together and roll them up and put them in a jar. When some free time comes around, have your spouse draw one out, and do the event together. it could be getting some ice cream, renting a movie, making some cookies, fishing, etc. Whatever the two of you enjoy doing!
-Take a Responsiblity: if your spouse normally does the dishes after dinner, volunteer to do it tonight. If they take out the trash, do it for them. If its their turn to bathe the kids, let them relax tonight and take the responsiblity. Make sure they know you're doing it to show love, not to use as a tally in the future!
-52 Weeks of Romance: This one is probably my favorite. you can purchase these at certain locations. There are 52 cards in the bag, half for the man, half for the woman. Each week, one spouse draws a card and has a week to complete the special something for the other. Zack and I did this the first year we were married, and loved it! They're small, meaningful creative ideas that sometimes are hard to come up with on your own. And its fun to surprise your spouse!
I just want to encourage you this week to do something special for your spouse. Anything. Just something to show them how much you love, appreciate and cherish them. And if you're not married, do something speical for a friend! Send them a note of encouragement, or "just wanted to say hey!". Or set up a lunch date, bring them a cup or coffee, or offer to babysit their kids.
I would LOVE to hear some of your ideas or things that you've done! We could all benefit and learn from each other!
10 lovely comments:
I am loving the blog! great post! i think my favorite piece of marriage advice was along the lines of your email... she put it "always try to out-bless one another" :)
Laura Dawkins
even though its only been just under 4 months that my husband and i were married, we have strived every day to make sure, in some way or another, that we find ways to bless one another and to keep the romance alive...Paul does what he likes to call "Happy Lovies Day" (we call each other lovie) every so often, in which he plans a whole day around doing nothing but fun things we enjoy together, whether it be watching old movies, fishing, reading at the park, or something else...one of my favorite things to do is to sneak a beautiful card or love letter (sprayed with my perfume of course) into his backpack before he leaves for class in the morning...i love doing that and i know he loves it too :) we also have a date night every week (different day depending on that week) and although he likes to be the one to plan it, i usually drop little hints along the way...someone told us before we got married that we should try to live out every day as though it's our last one with one another...we have to remember that we only get 1 life with them, and the Lord says our life is but a vapor!
I LOVE this post! I even referenced it on my blog!!! First of all, Andy and I love to just Play! We play around the house, we ride bikes together, we joke around any way we can! Also, earlier this year, we were short on money $$$$, so I planned a "cheap" date that was also a scavenger hunt. We ate dinner at Sam's Club (under $5), then walked around a mall that we Never go to (so things would seem "new"), and I gave him $5 to spend on ANYTHING he wanted to while he was there. He bought us ice cream :) We ended up by walking around the Half Price Book store! It was great with suprises around every corner, and cheap! We had a wonderful time!
Where do you get the 52 weeks of love? I want to do that! Sounds awesome. Thanks for the tip!
Great post. I have been married 28 years and you are so right it is the little things that count.
Life has a habit of getting in the way and you have to make time for each other. Some of our best "dates" over the years have been the ones that we spent little or no money on. Just enjoyed each other.
Hi! Susie, from Rensselaer, IN - found your blog through "Glamorous Life of a Housewife," because SHE posted on the Pioneer Woman site...and I think I've also visited your sister's blog, cuz you both went to the Symphony on the 4th! As I posted to her, Hubby and I are talking about going for the Beatles night at the end of August, then were dismayed to find out the Symphony doesn't actually PLAY the Beatles songs. That would've been cool. Or weird. Maybe both. I'm a pink gal - so I love your blog title. And I'm with you - gotta get some of those CUTE cupcake liners!!! :) Suz
I'm so glad you are my daughter!
You are a great wife and have a wonderful husband. This blog, today, is by far my most favorite to date!
My most favorite dates do not include big financial expense. I remember when in College, your father walked several blocks...probably many more than it seemed...to pick me up for our "date" and then would walk me back to his place for a spaghetti dinner, made by him...my favorite memory was walking hand in hand one night in the snow. It was snowing these giant flakes...I promise you, I could hear them fall from the sky onto the ground and listened to your dads breath as we strolled along the sidewalk, our footsteps crunching on the newly fallen snow. That was probably 34 years ago...but it seems like yesterday. Sometimes to be in one's presence...is the best of all. :D
Love, mom oxoxoxo
P.S. Can't wait to see you!
p.s.s. i apologize if i have recalled this story on your blog before... you will understand when you travel through your 50's.
I got up early and made Chai tea for my husband (his favorite). He had a long night of studying for his Greek class, so I thought I'd make him a treat before he headed off for school & I to work. He always appreciates little things like that. Toasting the spices & crushing them in the mortar made the whole place smell nice, too. Definitely a wonderful way to start the morning.
Aww, your mom's comment made me cry! That is so sweet! And I agree with her...sometimes just having Kiddo gone to my Mom's for the weekend and not having any plans, just being together is so good for us.
I never seem to get around to Thursday Thirteen anymore. I so hope that I can remember to do this instead! What a great idea. Thank you for commenting on my blog. With this surprize pregnancy, I need all the support I can get :)
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